My 5-year-old daughter has had hip dysplasia since she was born, but we didn't know it until a few months ago, because I don't believe in administering x-rays to children under 5 unless it will save their life. They always just told us, "It's a length discrepancy. She'll just need a special shoe."
Now we've found out it's hip dysplasia, and the Dr./surgeon's exact words were, "what we most commonly see with this is arthritis and an eventual need for hip replacement. Surgery is the only way to eliminate that risk."
Me : "What are the alternatives?"
Surgeon : "We can choose to do nothing, but I don't recommend that at all."
So here's how the whole scenario happened from there...
1st, they filed 15 people into the room, all of which dumped a stack of information into my lap one by one and yet somehow all at the same time, THEN asked if I had any questions. It was like, "Umm... I did have questions, until you drowned them. I haven't digested this enough to form new ones." So if you ask them to explain it all again, they act like, "We already told you, lady. What's so hard about this?" If you say you have no questions, they send in the scheduler. I *should* have asked for more time to consider it all, but I felt so ambushed, like a deer caught in the headlights. So they scheduled my daughter's surgery for November 24th.
November 23rd, the doctor re-scheduled the surgery because of a personal emergency, so it was supposed to be December 22nd.
Between November 24th & December 22nd, I got to thinking about the way things went there, and that I didn't like it at all. So we went to the pre-op appointment December 18th anyway, just to make the social worker happy (they're involved because of something that happened at my mom's house in '09, and just never left), and that's when I told them about my plans to move out of town, thinking the cast could be removed somewhere else. This move had been planned since way back in September, but I didn't say anything at the 1st appt. because my mom was sitting right next to me and there were reasons she couldn't know about it until last minute.
So the nurse said, "Just go through the pre-op anyway, as though it's going to happen." So we did... but the 2nd scheduler heard my daughter's congestive cough and said, "She can't have it on the 22nd, because she has to be congestion free for at least 2 weeks prior. His next available date us in February, but since you're moving, let's just cancel it altogether and you can call it back into the books if your plans change." So it was cancelled.
I was supposed to leave to the new town January 8th, so her 2nd opinion appointment was the 10th. The social worker knew about that on the 3rd and said, "Ok. You have one week to get the 2nd opinion." The night of the 7th, all my money got stolen, for which I have to file charges on the guy. I decided it was ok to wait until the 12th, since *I* didn't have to be there until the 13th. I called to re-schedule, and they told me the doctor she was supposed to see had cancelled everything for that day. So it was re-scheduled for Friday the 14th.
Sometime in that week, the hospital called me and said, "January 12th has opened up. Do you want that date?" For 2 reasons, A being that we don't have a permanent residence at the moment, and B being I *thought* I was crystal clear when I told them we're moving, I said NO to the 12th, clearly NO.
In the meantime, I was trying to wrangle money anywhere I could just to get there and then pay the people back out of my student loans. Tuesday the 11th, I had no idea where I was going to go (we've been between houses since the 4th.), so the social worker decided my daughter is best at my sister's house until I got a ticket out of town. By Friday morning, the 14th, I decided, "This just isn't happening the way I had planned." so I called the hospital back to re-schedule the surgery. They set it for February 2nd, but not before telling me they're "sick of my games". THEN I found out that *some*how *some*one put us on the books for the 12th when I said NO and it looked like I just didn't show up. I *don't* want my daughter to have surgery right now, period. To me it's ridiculous to slice a 5-year-old open as a preventative measure. We'll opt for surgery IF problems arise, but for now everything is good the way it is. BUT... two days ago, the social worker told me, "You're due in family court January 19th on grounds of medical neglect".
Long story short...
Do they even have a case?
Can I walk away from this and tell them to shove it?
Stu147
They might well have a case, yes. I don't know what first brought social worker intervention into things as you don't state specifically, but that could also have a bearing on this.
What I read from what you have said, and I'm sorry to be blunt, is a lot of faffing around and indecisiveness on your part which has avoided getting this procedure done. You seem to have excuses for so many missed or moved appointments and there really can only be so many excuses. This condition is one that needs to be treated, from what I understand, because it not only involves long term consequences. It also involves pain and affects mobility. This should have been the utmost priority for you and, in my opinion, you should have moved heaven and earth to get it done. You don't even fully substantiate your objections to surgery on a young child.
As I said, I apologise if this isn't what you want to hear but it's how I feel. I'm not in your shoes and so I am prepared that I might be wrong. I'm purely going on what you've written.
Orignal From: They're trying to call it medical neglect. Here's what happened. What do you think?
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